Table of Contents
Prelude To D&D Theater
Ah, allow me to whisk you away to a bygone era before the untold review—an age where the air was filled with the buzzing excitement of new realms awaiting to be discovered, not through pixelated screens, but by the roll of a twenty-sided dice and the feverish imaginings of the human mind. A time when Gary Gygax and Dave Arneson were the wizards behind the veil, gifting the world with an alchemy of ink and paper that ignited an era of tabletop role-playing; yes, I speak of Dungeons & Dragons.
D&D has reached out from the tabletop and entangled the very fabric of popular culture. The eighties were aglow with fantastical films of heroic exploits—films that echoed the allure of D&D quests. One could imagine the clattering of dice behind the epic storylines of “Conan the Barbarian,” “The NeverEnding Story,” or even the mystical quest in “Ladyhawke.” It was as if Hollywood had cast “Summon Blockbuster,” and the spell had succeeded beyond all expectations.
When TSR, the chieftain of Tactical Studies Rules, expanded its dominion into the realm of animated television with a “Dungeons & Dragons” series, the small screen could scarcely contain the vastness of its creative ambition. It transported a fellowship of youths from the mundanity of an amusement park into a realm of swords and sorcery, captivating the hearts of those who yearned for the eldritch and the extraordinary. This was not just a show; it was a multi-dimensional canvas upon which were painted the dreams of an entire generation.
Time Has Come to Honor
And so, years later, destiny rolled the dice once more. Under the watchful eyes of directors Jonathan Goldstein and John Francis Daley, a cinematic gem was forged: “Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves.” The film was a potion mixed with the choicest ingredients: humor as effervescent as a gnome’s giggle, action as intense as a dragon’s breath, and characters as complex as a labyrinthian dungeon.
The narrative unfurls like an exquisitely crafted scroll. Our protagonist, Edgin Darvis—performed with a dexterity only Chris Pine could muster—seeks his freedom from the stone-clad grasps of a prison, his bardic soul aching to liberate not just himself but his imprisoned compatriot, the fierce barbarian Holga Kilgore. Their quest? A journey to rescue Edgin’s estranged daughter, a young soul ensnared by lies from the duplicitous rogue Forge Fitzwilliam.
Honor Among Thieves
Ah, but what’s a quest without a motley crew? Enter Simon Aumar, a half-elf wild magic sorcerer of volatile power, and Doric, a tiefling druid in tune with the elemental forces of nature. The quintet embarks on a perilous adventure that unfurls with the unpredictability of a roll of the dice—a hero’s journey fraught with betrayal, treachery, and most thrillingly, redemption. Amongst the visceral experiences—like a Monty Pythonesque graveyard riddle and an underworldly voyage to the infamous Underdark—there lurks a dragon so curiously whimsical it might well be Garfield’s soul reincarnated in a draconian form.
Chris Pine’s Edgin is not your conventional leader; he is a bard of the soul, his essence composed of verses of vulnerability and stanzas of strength. He strikes a harmonious balance, resonating not as an authoritarian figure but as an emotional lynchpin around which the narrative spirals.
The film accomplished the Herculean task of transcending its own hype. A spectacle as inspiring as it was captivating, “Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves” was not just a tale of heroics, but an invitation—to stand up for the ideals that matter, to embrace the essence of teamwork, and to take that proverbial leap of faith. It was, quite simply, a love letter to the game, to the adventure, and to the relentless human desire for stories that make our hearts soar and our spirits quest for more.
Ah, it makes me ponder: perhaps it’s time I finally took up the dice and let them decide my fate in a D&D campaign. After all, the magic was never confined to the screen or the pages; it was always in the quest. Always in the story. Always in us.
So, adventurers and quest-seekers, be you veterans of the d20 or mere curious wanderers, know this: the treasure isn’t just in the gold or the magical artifacts. No, the true treasure is in the shared stories and the unbreakable bonds formed around a table scattered with character sheets and dice. Whether your table is in a cozy den or a digital realm, whether your campaign is just beginning or decades old, the magic—oh yes, the magic—is real.
Thus, I raise my goblet high and toast to the indomitable spirit of adventure, to the storytellers and the story-livers, and to the roll of the dice that awaits us all. Adventure on!
The Rating Review
The beginning of this film, a murky swamp of time that even a seasoned ranger would hesitate to look at. Like venturing through a forest shrouded in mist, where every step could land you in a pitfall or a spider’s web, the first 30 minutes was naught but a testing ground, a challenge for the strong-hearted for it was painful to watch.
But! Once you’d cleared that nebulous domain of the first 30 minutes of torment, the horizon burst into colors as vivid as an eldritch dawn! You’d find yourself swept into a world of high magic and gallant quests, worthy of ballads sung by the greatest bards and lauded by heroes and heroines across realms.
So, if you have the heart of a lion and the patience of an ancient tortoise, embark upon this odyssey. For once past that initial maze of annoyance, you’ll discover a movie worthy to be somewhat, kind of a legend. Though the tale unfurls into a magnum opus that would make even the gods pause and watch. Ah, yes, a saga deserving of the elusive ‘A,’ if only you dare to venture past the threshold!
The first 30 minutes was a yawn, with too much idle chatter and not enough action, if you ask me. Though the story of our hero’s past held promise, it remained shrouded in contrivance or words and scrolls – they tell us and don’t show us the character’s backstories for too long. Therefore, by the scales of critique, I bestow upon this journey a grade of B.
To the producer, writer’s and director, next time show, don’t tell, and keep it tight.
Onward to better tales, I say!
I recommend, if you are interested in actually playing Dungeons and Dragons, start here, and become an old pro in minutes: How To Play Dungeons and Dragons
